Anti-Cosmo: Hello, Clarice.
Wanda: Who's Clarice?
Anti-Cosmo: Oh so sorry! Can't see anything without my monocle! (puts monocle on)

Timmy: I don't like this. Anti-Cosmo is the opposite of Cosmo! Smart, evil,.. Uhh... smart!
Anti-Cosmo: Relax Child! I know you're here because Cosmo's faggigly gland is going bad!
Cosmo: (about his broken Faggigly Gland) How'd you know that?
Anti-Cosmo: Because I'm the opposite of you, Cosmo you ignorant boob! And my Faggigly Gland (turns into cow) is going good. Moo!

Mr. Turner: Oh boy, face cake!

Cosmo: If I don't make it, stay away from my wife!!
Anti-Cosmo:And If I DO make it, take mine!!

Anti-Wanda: My Anti-Cosmo sure was right when he said you'd be so busy looking in the laundry basket you'd never think to look under this thing.
Anti-Cosmo: Oh, Anti-Wanda, I do love you so much, but you are such a twit!
Wanda: I feel your pain.

Anti-Cosmo (with Cosmo's voice): Bye Timmy, Bye Wanda!

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