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|The Fairly OddParents episode transcript|
|"Playdate of Doom"|
|Airdate:||April 7, 2009|
00:00:30 time to deal with the most dangerous, evil, and vile prisoner here at abracatraz.
00:00:40 - Hello, Clarice-
00:00:42 I mean, jorgen.
00:00:44 That better not be more strained beets.
00:00:46 I asked for the pureed surf and turf.
00:00:48 - You will eat the beets and like them!
00:00:51 - Yes, jorgen.
00:00:52 I will eat the beets and like them.
00:00:54 See how agreeable I am?
00:00:55 Why don't you call wanda and cosmo to schedule a playdate with my nemesis—dah, I mean, that delightful rapscallion poof.
00:01:03 I think I'm completely rehabilitated.
00:01:05 [laughs] bang!
00:01:07 - Ha! you, foop?
00:01:09 Completely rehabilitated and ready for a playdate with poof?
00:01:13 Fat chance.
00:01:14 Cosmo, wanda, and I will never allow you near poof again.
00:01:18 Now, here's that huge block of ice you asked for no apparent reason.
00:01:24 Who are you, again?
00:01:25 Just to be clear.
00:01:26 - I am jorgen von strangle.
00:01:29 Don't be a dummy.
00:01:32 - No, jorgen, it is you who are the dummy.
00:01:36 You've played right into my hand, ..
00:01:42 Smuggling in baby's first evil recorder was a genius idea.
00:01:45 I'm so amazing, sometimes I scare myself.
00:01:48 Oh! there I am!
00:01:50 Now, to edit this on baby's first evil laptop and use jorgen's own words against him.
00:01:58 [warped high-pitch speech] [electronic beep] [phone ringing] - Hello?
00:02:06 - [Jorgen's voice] COSMO AND WANDA, I am jorgen von strangle!
00:02:12 Foop is completely rehabilitated and ready for a playdate with poof.
00:02:18 - Really, jorgen?
00:02:19 Do you think that's a good idea?
00:02:21 - Don't be a dummy!
00:02:22 - Hey, there's no reason to take that tone with-- - you will eat the beets and like them!
00:02:27 - What?
00:02:28 [rapid clicking] - The fool.
00:02:31 She suspects nothing.
00:02:32 That was so easy, it was like taking candy from myself.
00:02:36 [laughs maniacally] - Toot-toot!
00:02:41 Here comes the veggie train.
00:02:45 - Arugh!
00:02:46 - That was jorgen.
00:02:47 He said we have to eat beets and have foop over for a playdate.
00:02:56 [together] WHAT?
00:02:57 - We have to eat beets?
00:03:00 - Foop, the evil anti-fairy who tried to destroy two magical realms and a fast food chain, is coming to play?
00:03:07 - Poof-poof! - poof's right.
00:03:08 This is a bad idea.
00:03:10 - You said it, timmy.
00:03:11 Beets are the tubers of evil.
00:03:13 - Well, jorgen did say foop's rehabilitated.
00:03:17 And every baby deserves a second chance.
00:03:20 - They can't all be as good as you, poof.
00:03:22 Look, you ate all your vegetables.
00:03:24 That means you get another gold star on your good baby chart.
00:03:33 - Dah! beets!
00:03:34 Curse you, tubers of evil!
00:03:38 - There, it's square like me and cold like my heart.
00:03:42 Jorgen will never even know I'm gone.
00:03:45 Foop, you're such a genius.
00:03:47 I am, aren't i?
00:03:48 Yes, quite.
00:03:49 Perhaps I've been in here alone too long.
00:03:51 Thank goodness for diapers with hidden compartments.
00:03:54 They may not stop leaks, but they made my escape so easy, as will this!
00:04:00 Baby's first evil tunneling tool!
00:04:03 [laughing maniacally] [thunderous rumbling] [laughing crazily] [drill noise] Time for a playdate with poof, ..
00:04:16 Of doom!
00:04:18 [laughs maniacally] [cracking thunder] úeUCK-KUCK-UCK.
00:04:22 Hiccups. hick-hick-hick-uh!
00:04:25 [laughs] - Great job.
00:04:32 - Guys.
00:04:33 - I wasn't pouring my beets into a plant.
00:04:36 - What if jorgen's wrong and foop hasn't changed?
00:04:38 What if he's coming to destroy poof again?
00:04:41 - Now, timmy, you have to trust jorgen.
00:04:43 He's on top of everything.
00:04:45 - [snoring] [loud beep] [metal clank] [together] WE'RE FREE!
00:04:51 [all cheering] - Yeah, just in case, I wish for a super cool disguise so I can spy on foop when he gets here.
00:04:59 - You got it.
00:05:01 - A cleaning lady?
00:05:02 I was thinking ninja.
00:05:04 - That's funny; so was i.
00:05:05 We'll call you mrs. sparklebottom.
00:05:07 [knocking] - OH, TIMMY?
00:05:09 Ooh, an ugly little cleaning lady.
00:05:12 I bet timmy's dad hired you so I could go to the spa.
00:05:16 You can go up in the attic and deal with that vicious hornets' nest.
00:05:20 - What? wait!
00:05:24 [doorbell dings] - Hello, auntie wanda and uncle idiot.
00:05:30 I mean, cosmo.
00:05:31 Thank you so much for allowing me to visit.
00:05:34 - Aw, thank you, foop.
00:05:36 We hope you're ready to be a good boy for a change.
00:05:39 - Oh, I most certainly am, auntie wanda.
00:05:42 And this is for you, uncle.
00:05:45 - Beets?
00:05:46 Why does everyone hate me?
00:05:47 - And I even brought a gift for my new friend poof.
00:05:52 - [growls] - It's a special new portal to oblivion.
00:05:55 I mean, playpen!
00:05:56 - That's very kind of you, foop.
00:05:58 You boys can play in it and-- - no!
00:06:01 Don't put me in there!
00:06:04 [ominous music] I MEAN-- [clears throat] I mean, I've been in solitary confinement for so long.
00:06:10 Heh-heh, yes.
00:06:11 Closed spaces make me crazy.
00:06:12 No, they don't! yes, they do!
00:06:14 Oh, be quiet!
00:06:16 - Ohh-kay.
00:06:17 Uh, poof, why don't you give foop a hug, sweetie?
00:06:22 - Poof-poof!
00:06:22 - Oh, I'm afraid he just doesn't like me, auntie.
00:06:26 Weep-weep, crying sounds, weep-weep.
00:06:29 - Poof, foop is trying to be nice.
00:06:31 You have to learn how to forgive people after they try and destroy you.
00:06:35 For making foop cry, you lose a star on your good boy chart.
00:06:41 - Egh.
00:06:43 [creepy organ music] [whimpering] - You're going down, you bulbous little brat.
00:06:50 - Aha!
00:06:51 I heard that with my hornet-stung, super swollen ear.
00:06:55 Foop is—ah!
00:06:56 More hornets!
00:07:01 - What an odd, ugly cleaning lady.
00:07:03 - I'm a ninja!
00:07:04 - You boys play while I give cosmo his lunch.
00:07:09 Here's your lunch, cosmo.
00:07:11 - Ah, you got to be kidding me.
00:07:14 - ♪♪ La da-da-ta ♪♪
00:07:15 poof, I fear I might have been vague earlier when I said you're going down.
00:07:20 Allow me to clarify.
00:07:22 [ominous music] [zapping noise] The playpen contains an interdimensional vortex that will transport you to the outer reaches of the universe!
00:07:39 Hiccups. hick-hick-hick.
00:07:41 - Aha!
00:07:42 I heard that.
00:07:44 Wanda, listen to this.
00:07:45 Foop was planning to-- - oh, timmy?
00:07:48 Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo, a ninja, great!
00:07:51 I need you to make a man named dinkleberg " - yah!
00:07:57 - Poof-poof-poof!
00:07:58 - Don't be silly, poof.
00:07:59 Foop's not going to send you to an alternate universe.
00:08:03 Now, be good and have fun.
00:08:05 - Yes, poof.
00:08:06 Let's have fun.
00:08:10 [swoopy chimes] [wet splat noise] Weep, weep.
00:08:16 - Oh, what happened?
00:08:18 - Poof tried to harm me with beets.
00:08:22 - I told you beets were dangerous.
00:08:24 - Poof, that was not nice.
00:08:26 You lose another star.
00:08:30 - Yes, you're going in that playpen.
00:08:33 Your idiot parents are going to send you to another dimension, and I'm going to watch.
00:08:38 Ready, friend?
00:08:40 Let's play!
00:09:09 - [whistling a tune] [loud zapping] - [wailing] poof!
00:09:17 [wailing] poof!
00:09:19 [wailing] poof!
00:09:23 This I my favorite toy.
00:09:24 Mine too. I don't even know you anymore!
00:09:27 We think you'll find it's a real blast.
00:09:31 [jangly happy music] blast!
00:09:37 More convincing crying.
00:09:39 - Poof, that's it.
00:09:40 I'm taking away your last gold star.
00:09:42 - Yeah, you get a time-out in the wonderful playpen that makes beets disappear!
00:09:47 [cracking thunder] - Dah!
00:09:50 [suspenseful music] Poof-poof-poof-poof poof-poof-poof-poof-poof!
00:09:54 - Nonsense, poof.
00:09:55 The playpen is not and interdimensional vortex of doom.
00:09:59 - Wanda, stop!
00:10:01 Stop, foop.
00:10:03 I know what you're up to.
00:10:04 - Boy, you are one annoying cleaning lady.
00:10:09 - [wailing] - Ugh!
00:10:12 - Eeh-eh-eh-eeh-eh-eh!
00:10:13 Eh! ugh!
00:10:15 - Oh, no.
00:10:15 The playpen really is a vortex of doom!
00:10:18 Poof was telling the truth.
00:10:20 - Good-bye, poof!
00:10:22 [laughs maniacally] ..
00:10:26 I'm a ninja!
00:10:29 - Oh!
00:10:31 [zapping noise] [wailing] This is all your fault.
00:10:38 Really? I blame you.
00:10:39 Well, you would.
00:10:40 That's so like you.
00:10:41 I'll get you, poof!
00:10:47 - Poof, I'm so sorry I didn't believe you.
00:10:50 Can you forgive me?
00:10:52 - Poof-poof.
00:10:53 - All in a day's work for timmy sparklebottom, cleaning ninja.
00:11:00 - No more beets?
00:11:01 - And we don't have to worry about foop anymore.
00:11:05 - You haven't seen the last of me, poof.
00:11:07 Or me either.
00:11:08 I know that; I'm right here.
00:11:09 I was talking to them.
00:11:10 Oh, pipe down!
00:11:11 You're the one who got us into this in the first place.
00:11:14 We'll be back.
00:11:15 Stop looking at me!
00:11:17 I hate beets!
00:11:19 So do i!