Dolores-Day Crocker: I'm talking about your life! You're nothing but a crackpot who wastes all his time chasing fairies! [then she takes a broom and smacks Crocker with it]
Crocker: [grabs the broom holding it horizontal with his mother dangled to it] FREEZE! YOU CRAZY WITCH!!!!!!
[Freezes his mother with an ice gun]
Crocker: My obsession with FAIRIES has yielded nothing but disaster. There's only one sane thing to do, find another crazy obsession! Let's go to the wheel of destiny! [he pulls a lever, making a wall flip and reveal the wheel] One spin away from a whole new life! [he spins the wheel which stops at 'women' ] Maybe I should go for something a little more realistic. Come on Unicorns!
Crocker: Ah, Little Ireland. Everything is so green here. Even the stoplights. [noise of car crashing]
Timmy: Cosmo, what are we doing here? I said I wish not Irish.
Cosmo: ...then, the great potato looks in the mirror to see if he's the fairest potato of them all. If he's not, he gives the hotter-looking potato a poison apple!
Crocker: Eureka! I've captured a leprechaun! Wait, maybe I should say something more Irish. Shiver me timbers!
Wanda: Cosmo, fairies aren't allowed to poof up money! Where'd you get a pot of gold?
Cosmo: From some leprechauns, duh.
Wanda: Which ones? Some of them can be really dangerous.
Timmy: Come on, aren't they all just harmless little green twerps who sell soap on TV?
Lucky: Our gold's been stolen again, by a wee paid laddie named Cosmoooooo
Timmy: How do you know it was Cosmoooooo?
Greeny: He left a note. [holds up a note that says 'I tuk yer gold, Cosmoooooo]
Wanda: [to Cosmo] You left a note!?
Cosmo: It's called manners, Wanda. Look it up.
[after Lucky and Greeny take Wanda and Poof on their bikes]
Cosmo: Timmy, we gotta get Poof and Wanda back. She has to pay for lunch.
Timmy: Don't worry, Cosmo. We just have to get that gold from Mr. Crocker before he spends any of it.