- "I'm Chet Ubetcha saying my tire is flat and we'll never get back to the studio in time. This is Chet Ubetcha saying 'I'll do the news from right here.'"
- "What about me? I'm hot, too!"
- "Well, stick me in a dress and call me Sally!"
- "This is Chet Ubetcha saying 'Poop poop.' Sorry, I just love that joke."
- "In one hour, we're all gonna diiiiine!"
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